I pulled out my trusty sewing machine before Christmas and started to sew, but I broke my last needle,and even though I went and got new ones last week I didn't start sewing.
So, I started going through some of the pretty vintage fabrics and cutter quilts I have been stockpiling to make pillows and aprons to sell. Have I made any? NO!!! I sat here and looked at them and thought of some great ideas. I just haven't been able to get myself to start.
I did finally get to an auction on Thursday, the first day I have driven anywhere by myself for over a month. I was able to hobble in with a cane, and I figured that if my knee locked up I knew enough people that someone would get me home or to a hospital. The pickings were really slim, but I was able to get a few things.
Well, the sewing machine is out, I have lots of fabrics, and I found a few new vintage goodies for the shop. It's a start, but I think the real problem is that I am very independent and self reliant. I raised two daughters on my own, one who has a serious illness, and I went back to college and grad school in my 40s. I don't like not being able to function on my own. I need to get me back.
So I am planning to take a scary leap next week.
I am going to go to the University of Kentucky Hospital and see if I can work out some surgery for both of my knees. This is momentous for me, because I am extremely hospital phobic. (good grief, people die in those places) and because of the fact that I lost my health insurance coverage. I do know that they work with people without insurance, so I am going to see if we can work something out together. Now that I have put it in writing, I will feel like a total wimp if I don't follow through so this will hopefully give me a big push.
In the meantime, I am going to put a new needle in my sewing machine, design some pillows, and list a few new things in both of my shops.
I'll keep you posted and thanks for being here with me.
You're not lazy. It is hard to get back to things after the holidays. I've lost my routine and finding it difficult to get anything accomplished. Good luck with your knees!
ReplyDeleteSweetie, you're not lazy; you're INJURED! I hope you're able to work something out for the surgery you need. Sending virtual hugs your way!
ReplyDeleteWow, you are really brave at heart. Go for the hospital negotiations, all they can say is "no", and don't take that for an answer! Insurance costs for them are pretty high, I bet they can work out something for you, you just have to talk to the right person, keep asking, going a little higher each time and see what happens. Blessings on you and yours.
ReplyDeleteIt may feel like laziness but its your body's way of making you recuperate.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the surgery!
Abbie
I feel the same way you do, I have so many ideas floating around in my head and I haven't done anything! My problem is not my knees, it's my head, and like you I think I need to become a little more pro active in finding some relief. Thanks for the inspiration, maybe I'll list a few things in my shop today.
ReplyDelete2012 is the first year that Obama's healthcare reform is going to take place. You are going to be able to purchase government health insurance if you need it or don't have a job that offers it. I don't know too much about it, but you should look into it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, what happened with your knee? In high school I tore all the ligaments connected to the knee cap and I opted for rest and physical therapy. Have you tried that? It really seemed to help!
I can't wait to see what you create all people have slumps or slow times just go with it and don't fight it, your creative self will come back. Can't wait to hear about your trip to talk to the hospital be strong you are not the first or last not to have health insurance.
ReplyDeleteLisa
Laura,
ReplyDeleteMy husband just had out patient surgery on his knee. It is incredible how quickly he healed. He's having the other one done this month. He was in a lot of pain from a shredded meniscus and arthritis. He's in no pain now and has finished up his physical therapy early. He waited 18 years. He's so sorry he waited.
I don't know what damage you have to your knees, but I do hope you will check it out asap. Pain free, Laura! Get moving, it will happen. Out patient is easy and quick and recovery was a breeze.
I haven't done much either- don't be so hard on yourself. You need to get healthy. So scoot.
: )
(I talk big, but I hate going to the hospital, too. I spent way too much time there with my son.)
Be well!
Girl... you are so not lazy! I hope your visit to the hospital goes well. I really think they need to be nicer and work better with people who are uninsured. Especially those with obvious medical needs... like you and your knees... :) Can't wait to see what you end up making with all those pretty fabrics and cutter quilts!
ReplyDeleteTaking care of yourself and resting your body is well-deserved! Good luck to you as you pursue this surgery and I hope you can overcome your fears and have confidence in the wisdom of the doctors. Jesus be with you on your journey to walking without pain! andrea@townandprairie
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the surgery. Please don't be so hard on yourself. You are not lazy. The creative process sometimes goes in fits and starts.
ReplyDeleteI attended a Dakota Writing Project conference several years ago, and they discussed "prewriting"--the process of thinking about what you're going to write, or jotting down ideas, before you actually write. Well--I think you have been "pre-sewing" coming up with ideas.
Good luck with your surgery and I do hope that things work out so you can have the surgery.
ReplyDeleteI think sometimes life can be so overwhelming and I think you are making great strides towards success. Hope your upcoming week is a blessed one!
ReplyDeleteI can realte to so much in your post, Laura. I just got out the sewing machine I bought after my husband died (and the manual!) yesterday because I'm determined to master it. I have bins and bins of vintage fabric just waiting to be transformed into something lovely. I don't want to just sell it in my etsy shop so others can make it into a treasure. I want to do it! So I understand the process and the hesitation. I'm right there with you. I hope you have success with your knee surgery. I'm just recovering from thyroid surgery and a little "cancer." I'm your newest follower and I hope you pop over to Cottage and Creek and follow back. We women are strong! I know you'll find the inspiration you seek.
ReplyDeleteLynn
I hope you'll get some good news abot your knees! I'm sure that will help your get up and go return! Hugs, Leena
ReplyDelete